Just End The Stupidity
Recently, the New York Jets community was informed of the abrupt mid-season retirement of an important piece to their championship aspirations annoying and loudmouthed “Superfan.”
Ed Anzalone AKA “Fireman Ed” is hanging up the helmet. And I have to be honest, Good Riddance. No one will miss you.
Fireman Ed represented what fans hate about themselves. He thought he was important. He thought he had an effect on the outcome. He thought the owners cared about him. That the team considered him an equal. That fans respected him and opponents gameplanned for him. And worst of all, his attitude puts forth the idea that somehow, after he walks away, the game couldn’t continue.
However, Ed Anzalone is NOT going to stay away from Jets games. No, no, he will still grace the stadium with his presence but he is retiring the “character” of “Fireman Ed.”
Let’s get something straight right now. “Fireman Ed” is no more a character than Guy Fieri. If “Fireman Ed,” a brash, loudmouthed, self important, former New York City Fireman is a character then Ed Anzalone is the greatest Method Actor since Stanislavski.
In a column in the Metro, aka, the paper a guy hands you so you can throw it away for him, Ed Anzalone wrote “On Thanksgiving night, I left the Jets game before halftime…We have had much worse teams than this and I never left before. I pride myself in that, because I am not a quitter.”
Already we start with complete bullshit. In a letter, in which he quits a position he doesn’t have and was never given to him, he states how he prides himself on not quitting.
He goes on to state that his decision was made, not due to the pitifulness of the Jets or the deep regret he felt for wasting his energy for over a quarter century for a team whose highlights include NOT drafting Dan Marino and having a Commisioner snicker when annoncing its draft pick, but rather for being bothered by knucklehead fans. He states “The fact that I chose to wear a Mark Sanchez jersey this year and that fans think I am on the payroll — which is an outright lie — have made these confrontations more frequent. Whether it’s in the stands, the bathroom or the parking lot, these confrontations are happening on a consistent basis.” He further states “Although I can “hold my own,” I do not want to lose my temper and make a stupid mistake. I have a responsibility to the families and kids that enjoy the game and Fireman Ed. “
Understandable point. There are plenty of people who go to football games and get loaded, and just don’t know how to act in public. And Ed would have a case if he didn’t put himself in front of a crowd and demand their attention. Now he has it and it hurts his widdle feewings that the big bad man doesn’t like Mark Sanchez. Oh, and most importantly. KIDS AND FAMILIES DON’T ENJOY FIREMAN ED. NO ONE WILL CARE WHEN YOU AREN’T THERE TO CHEER. TATOO THAT BACKWARDS ON YOUR FACE SO YOU CAN SEE IT IN A MIRROR!
“I have enjoyed my time in chanting the greatest chant in all of sports…I will attend games as usual, just not as Fireman Ed.”
First of all, J-E-T-S JETS! JETS! JETS! is not the greatest chant in all of sports. Hotty Toddy is. It’s not even close.
Second, and most importantly, you have the most recognizable face in the stadium. You have “created a character” that lead cheers for nearly 100,000 people every week. Do you think you can show up in jeans and a t-shirt not emblazoned with last name of the worst quarterback in the NFL whose name doesn’t rhyme with “Shmlain Shmabbert.” and expect drunken idiots to not call you an asshole? Or Worse?!
But why do many fans dislike him? After all he’s the “unofficial mascot.” That’s the key. The attitude is not of someone who is “unofficial.” He’s no Barrel Man or Chief Zee. Chief Zee got help from Chris Cooley when his tomahawk went missing. And there’s currently a stage musical in development about Barrel Man.
Could it be more? Could it just be that people are sick of watching a grown man, yell and scream and run around while on disability from NYC. That he had to sue the city over being transferred for having too many medical leave days. That when talking about his retirement he claims that he was forced to retire: “The doctor said I could not be a firefighter anymore; I could not fight fires anymore; that broke my heart … Fortunately, I am able to walk…All real. Not made up. Real. Pictures don’t lie, brother. Thank God I’m walking around.” But is famous for sitting on shoulders?
Or maybe it was when he went against his Union Brothers and went on TV to support the West Side Stadium
It’s much simpler. He represents the Jets. He’s loud, annoying, self-important and ultimately completely irrelevant.
Now let us let him be irrelevant.
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