Five Observations From The Rangers/Islanders Game

By: Greg “All City” Vitucci

1. The influx of young players into the Ranger’s lineup recently has definitely stirred up the locker room.

The trade of Mike Rupp and the subsequent roster moves has obviously made a difference, just not on the power play. No change has been more obvious than the improvement in Carl Hagelin’s play. Going from being the baby in the locker room to a grown ass man, as compared to JT Miller, and the struggling Chris Kreider, Hags has tallied 4 goals this week so far. Hags has embraced the role of a mentor and his confidence is growing.

Also have you seen this kid’s hair? He takes his helmet off and somehow a constant gust of wind sweeps through the arena during his intermission interview. His perfect quaff flows in the magical breeze, like blood flows to my penis when I saw the Swimsuit edition cover. Seriously though, the dude has to be taking hair tips from Henrik.

2. What is Brian Boyles role?

He’s been a stalwart of the Rangers’ third line recently, and we know what to expect from number 22. He’s going to block shots, he’s going to win faceoffs, and he is a solid penalty killer. But is that enough? He was absent from the score sheet most of the playoffs last year and so far this season only has 1 point. Maybe a little less time on the goatee and a little more time working on the offense. Does he have a second offensive move behind dipping his shoulder, driving to the net with a defender on his back, and using his length to get off a one-handed backhand that has the speed equivalent of a queef? He needs to find the back of the net or he will find himself as a healthy scratch more often. The forwards on this team are too good for him to be the seventh best offensive minded forward. Sure Boyle will drop the gloves occasionally but should he really be relegated to fourth line duties, or is he better served being traded?

3. How adorable are the little kids dancing and making faces behind Al Trautwig during intermission.

Whenever I see kids loving every second of the live game experience, a little bit of the bitterness I have leftover from the lockout fades. Though more bitterness would fade if those same tykes beat Gary Bettman to death with their souvenir sticks on television behind Al (Ed. Note – HE DOESN’T MEAN THIS THE VIEWS CONTAINED ABOUT THE MURDER OF MR.BETTMAN DO NOT REFLECT THOSE OF AFRSports.  Just Greg.  He’s crazy.). I’ll personally reimburse the dad who spent $227 on those tiny sticks.

4. Does the rest of the league know how fucking good Ryan Callahan is?

We see him on daily basis and maybe his grinding brilliance isn’t as apparent as the goal scoring touch of Marion Gaborik, but The Captain, has got his shit together. He plays on every phase of the game. It was clear the Rangers really missed him on the penalty kill, when Cally was out briefly with a shoulder injury. His fore-check is ferocious; flying around to keep opponents deep in their own end and causing turnovers. His puck handling skills he doesn’t gets a chance to showcase enough, but certainly are on display during the shootout. He buried the game winner against the Boston Bruin’s Tukka Rask this week. He cleans up rebounds like Lindsey Lohan cleans a coke mirror. He blocks shots like he’s getting hit with marshmallow peeps not frozen rubber disks. More importantly he’s a leader in the clubhouse, and a calm collected presence on the ice when the momentum begins to shift.

5. Someone get John Tavaris off the Islanders.

Please? Not because I don’t want him in my conference or anything like that, it’s for his own good. Get him away from the catastrophe of a franchise from Nassau County. He is way too good to be hidden on the Islanders. He isn’t a free agent until 2018 but really it would probably be for the best if he was traded. Islanders get some top prospects; JT gets to play for a team with at least one other talented person around him, with a chance to win some trophies.

 

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